Your Age: 21-30
Length of Relationship : 11 - 20 years
How long ago did the betrayal occur?: In the last few months - less than 90 days (3 months)
How did you learn about it?: He confessed out of guilt while I was telling him all of the plans I had to become a better partner and spouse for us because he was unhappy with the marriage.
Describe how you are feeling now, or how you felt when you found out.: Heartbroken. Empty. Angry. Sad. Lost.
Like I can't breathe.
Like I'm not alive.
How have your normal habits changed (eating, sleeping, etc)?: I lost a lot of weight and only eat two meals a day now. When I sleep I wake up with nightmares. I don't smile or laugh as much anymore. I rarely talk to people.
What are you using to cope with your emotions? Is it working for you?: Journaling. Exercise. Walks. Self-help books. Working on my career.
But they only bring temporary relief from the pain.
What are your next steps?: Hoping to land a good job and become independent again.
Hoping to find happiness within myself.
What emotions have come up for you as you've been going through this? (select all that apply):Shock/Disbelif, Sadness, Afraid, Betrayed
What emotions are missing from the list?: Anxiety
What advice would you give to others in this situation?: It's not your fault they cheated. You could not have stopped it from happening. You can't control what the other person does. It would have happened eventually. Cheating is a character defect.
What else would you like to share?: Be kind to yourself. You are not alone. There's a reason our stories sound the same. You are not at fault.