Your Age: 41-50
Length of Relationship : 3 - 5 years
How long ago did the betrayal occur?: It's been a while - over a year ago
How did you learn about it?: Spouse confessed
Describe how you are feeling now, or how you felt when you found out.: Devastated. Shocked. I couldn’t believe that my spouse, who always conveyed concern, could have an affair with someone 22 years his junior. The worst part is that at first I was told that they were married. I found out by accident 9 months later that it was an affair
How have your normal habits changed (eating, sleeping, etc)?: I have trouble sleeping.
What are you using to cope with your emotions? Is it working for you?: I diarize my thought and feelings. We’ve been for counseling. We’ve done workshops.
It doesn’t seem to be working for me
What are your next steps?: I am not sure. At first I thought that I wanted to stay married and that that was what I wanted.
I’m having doubts that that’s what is best for me
What emotions have come up for you as you've been going through this? (select all that apply):Shock/Disbelif, Anger, Sadness, Afraid, Betrayed, Devalued, Shame/Ashamed
What emotions are missing from the list?:
What advice would you give to others in this situation?:
What else would you like to share?: The multiple lies that were fed to me all became too much to endure. I uncovered the truth piecemeal by myself, not because my spouse was truthful.