three hundred seventy four (374)

Your Age: 41-50

Length of Relationship : 11 - 20 years

How long ago did the betrayal occur?: Recently - less than 30 days

How did you learn about it?: I went thru his phone and found out he was texting a girl he worked with.

Describe how you are feeling now, or how you felt when you found out.: I felt like an udder failure in my life. I want to die. I wanted to scream why am I not enough. I still feel that way. I feel ugly and hurt.

How have your normal habits changed (eating, sleeping, etc)?: Not eating as much. Sleep is hard some nights.

What are you using to cope with your emotions? Is it working for you?: I want to just end it. I want things back the way they were but I am just so angry. I want to get so drunk and high and just leave.

What are your next steps?: I don’t know I don’t want to walk away but it just so hard sometimes.

What emotions have come up for you as you've been going through this? (select all that apply): Shock/Disbelif, Anger, Sadness, Alone, Afraid, Voiceless, Betrayed, Devalued, Invisible, Shame/Ashamed

What emotions are missing from the list?: Ugly and old

What advice would you give to others in this situation?: I don’t know.

What else would you like to share?: I just wish that someone would just see me and my love and that it was enough.