Your Age: 51 +
Length of Relationship : 21 years or more
How long ago did the betrayal occur?: A while ago - 6-12 months
How did you learn about it?: I found a message on my ipad, we have family sharing. He obviously wiped the message from his phone/ ipad but not mine. it started with "whats app not working.." I thought it it was one of the kids messaging their friends as it was covered in emojis.
Describe how you are feeling now, or how you felt when you found out.: utterly betrayed and broken. crushed. worthless. angry. full of adrenaline and depressed all at the same time. I'm grieving.
How have your normal habits changed (eating, sleeping, etc)?: can't eat, have lost quite a bit of weight...i guess that's the best thing that's come out of this. can't sleep, drinking alcohol ++, unable to function, think, work
What are you using to cope with your emotions? Is it working for you?: reading information to try and understand what I'm feeling is normal. just trying to find some guidance about why this happened and what i should do as I cant talk to anyone about this.
What are your next steps?: just get through today, then I'll try and get through tomorrow
What emotions have come up for you as you've been going through this? (select all that apply): Anger, Sadness, Alone, Betrayed, Devalued
What emotions are missing from the list?: grief
What advice would you give to others in this situation?: Do not blame yourself, let yourself grieve, give yourself time and try to believe in yourself- there are good things in you and you even if you can't see them.
What else would you like to share?: